We are you
I’m a 31 year old transman, of Spanish origin. My family is born again “extreme” catholics. They are uber conservative and republican. They refuse to talk about it, now that it has become clear that I will never be what they expect of me. To be a “moral, natural female as God in- tended”.
I have come out to everyone: my job, my friends, my extended family, and the world at large via the medium of YouTube and video blogging. I have made friends I never thought I would make. I have developed a global or at least multi- cultural community. I have had the highest joys in self-determination, self-expression, and the liberation of finally being who I am. I have faced a gamut of stressors, from the fear of coming out to the people I saw every day, to the sheer demolishing realization that being who I am is costing me my family, the people who claim to love me the most. But who, in actuality, understand and respect me the least.
But, even as the days wear on, and my outsides more and more match my insides, and I am finally associated with masculine pronouns and social interactions, there is a growing fear of the loss of ability to find love. You see, I am gay. But my body, at least for now, doesn’t match the stereotypical idea of what a masculine or biological male body should look like. So while my job, for now, and my friends, and so far the world at large... accepts me. I may never be able to breach the boundary of friendship with another human being.
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